Blogoscopes Week of September 24th to October 1st, 2007

Aries - Hearing voices is not just for crazy people any more. A surprising percentage of the so-called 'normal' population hear their names being called, instructions being given and many even hold conversations with people who aren't visible. Sometimes the voices are familiar and sometimes they're not. The frequency apparently increases as we age. Admitting this has not always carried the stigma of mental illness - in earlier times it was interpreted as a sign of demonic possession. A case of pick your poison. Listen well but be careful what you repeat.

Taurus - Know what's the best thing about the see-saw? When the right person is on the other end of that board the potential for fun on a fulcrum is limitless. The two of you can take turns lifting each other on high or balance so you're both in mid air. Trust in your playmate means you won't either get slammed to the ground or be left hanging. When you both play nice, the non-stop up and down is a lot of fun. Um, I said when you both play nice. Your attempt at being uplifting has turned into hanging someone up. It's time to get off your duff.

Gemini - In just a few short weeks, your ruler Mercury will once again go retrograde. Venus, the love of his life, will tell him that it just won't ever work between them, and that she's moving to Moscow to be closer to her true love Mars. Whatever bad news you receive now, it is definitely being over-dramatized, and nobody is able to clearly view the entire picture. My advice to you on dealing with this situation is to throw a party. It will help to pass the time while you wait for things to work themselves out - and they will, work themselves out.

Cancer - Last evening at a friend's studio opening, I got into a discussion about boots. My favourite boots are nearly ten years old and no longer particularly fashionable. They lace up to my knee - no zippers that's cheating - so they hug my legs. They have a soles like tractor treads so every step feels solid. Needless to say, they're black. They are so comfortable that I have actually slept in them! Okay, okay, passed out in them, but the point is, that it won't kill you to put something off until tomorrow. If you can't do that, then ask somebody to give you a hand.

Leo - You're not the biggest fan of winter. It's cold and damp; the lake is frozen; outdoor activities become problematic and; there's never enough daylight. But then, every once in a while, you get one of those perfect December days - you know, all sunshiny with a crisp blue sky and smooth tobogganing down slopes of fresh powdery snow. Get this picture in your head and keep it there over the days ahead. Not all winter is dark, and not all downhill is a crash - sometimes what looks really scary is truly fun and easy.

Virgo - Is guilt an emotion? In the sense of being hate turned inward, then yes it most certainly is an emotion. And, it's the one emotion that is, hopefully, susceptible to reason. So listen up - you are human: this is a learning experience: the curve is steep but you will make it. And the best thing is that you are moving toward a carrot, not ahead of a stick. It's all about future rewards not past punishments. Work is work, play is play and you need to participate in all of it fully, without hating yourself for the fun parts.

Libra - Sometimes it's incredibly difficult to get your point across. It's like sitting in the nosebleed seats at the Sky Dome and trying to call the play on the field. It's like being in the audience at The Price Is Right and shouting numbers at a stranger in contestant row. Even if you could make yourself heard, why should anybody believe you before anyone else in the screaming throng that surrounds you? Here's a hint: remember that you're talking down to someone. You need volume and attitude. Grab a megaphone and slap on a sneer.

Scorpio - All you vegetarians stick with me here because if you can't share the sentiment you are at least familiar with the concept: the perfect steak. It's thick and juicy, prepared to a degree that suits whatever your individual taste requires - well done, medium-well, medium, medium-rare, rare and blue rare. There's probably some aficionado out there who has names for at least two more degrees of done-ness between blue and raw, but that's the point isn't it? Life is a steak and should be served to suit you. So how would you like that cooked?


Sagittarius - Oscar Wilde has been quoted as saying he always carried his diary with him on his travels in case he needed something scandalous to read. You might want to think about doing something similar with your diary, if not for the scandal, then for a couple of very good reasons. It's a reminder of your past - helping you measure how far you've travelled toward your goals, reminding you who you used to be, who you are and who you want to be. It will also give you a good chance to do some editing with an eye to future publication.


Capricorn - So you got the middle seat, in the middle row. You're flanked on the right by a dentist from the mid-west, his alcoholic wife and spaced out kids and on the left by a Heavy Metal cover band with rock star pretensions. The flight attendants are avoiding eye contact, which sucks cause you could really use a drink. Hey, psst! Remember, two seats to the right there's an alcoholic! And I'm sure somebody in this row could roll you a joint if needed. Being stuck in the middle doesn't mean you can't have fun.

Aquarius - Anticipation is a wonderful spice. By the time you get around to any actual experience, your senses are so cranked up with waiting that when it finally occurs, every aspect of it is heightened. Of course Anticipation has a twin sister named Dread, who creates a similar, although less salubrious effect. Either one can get you so carried away that reality is reduced to something that is rapidly disappearing in the rear view mirror. Write your name and address in your undies and drop some breadcrumbs if you ever want to find you way back to Earth.

Pisces - Home staging improves your chances of a quick and profitable turn over when it comes to real estate. An entire television genre has sprung up around this idea. It's easy to get caught up in the pretty decorator-ness of it all but in reality what home staging does, is imply the kind of lifestyle that prospective buyers want. It works for more than real estate. If you want people to buy into your latest idea, you are going to have to dress it up real nice and make it sparkle. That way everybody will want what you've got.