Blogoscopes Week of November 23 to 30, 2008

Aries - If you're not a Lord of the Rings fan then this will probably mean nothing to you, but here goes: you are about to enter the ruins of the ancient Dwarvish kingdom of Moria. There are no other roads forward and the way back is blocked. You must brave the cavernous dark and fight off the monsters you meet along the way. The best way to survive? Keep your sword ready, remember that you have a higher purpose and stop daydreaming about the cute elf.

Taurus - Have you ever wondered whether you might be speaking in tongues? Do you occasionally find the people you are conversing with gaping at you slack jawed and confused? If you have an important point to make you should know that not everyone can keep up with your thinking. Perhaps you should consider writing things down; like a contract. It has the double bonus of forcing you to slow down just a little, and of giving others something to refer to when they lose the plot.

Gemini - I've always been fascinated by the idea of the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul; After all, I love shopping and it is the world's oldest mall. You will notice that I said I'm fascinated by the idea. I'm not so sure I could cope with the reality. And with the bargaining skills you are about to exhibit, I would say neither could you. Remember, when you are trying to negotiate a deal the idea is that you pay less and get more, not the other way around.

Cancer - Our sleeping minds can present us with answers to issues we struggle with in waking hours. This week you could dream that you move to a developing nation where your incredible abilities bring an end to hunger and violence. You dream will also show you how to save the environment, cure the common cold and find lost socks. Hang on to the good feelings this engenders because when you wake up all you'll remember is "cabbage soup".

Leo - In the near future when your neighbour asks to borrow your power tools, it would be best not to have said tools in your hand when you deny any knowledge of their where-abouts. Be honest and up front about your current need to use the power tools and tell your neighbour to come back in a few weeks. An important corollary to this is that you really do need the tools; there's work to be done so charge up that drill and get to it.

Virgo - When we're busy we often say we have enough on our plate or we have a full plate. It's an expression that seems to suggest that our responsibilities are the food that fuels our lives. Your plate is certainly full and although it may look like it's simply heaped with green stuff, it's actually a mound of peas. You may not be crazy about peas, but I predict that in typical Virgo fashion you will devour them all one pea at a time.

Libra - There's a new moon coming up later this week and in anticipation, preparation and celebration you appear to be making some sweeping changes to your life. You know better than anyone else exactly what you need at this time so by all means make your plans, gather in your supplies and ready yourself in mind, body and spirit for the coming of the new you. But be warned! Painting your front door fuchsia will cause shock, not judgement.

Scorpio - You are shiny. In fact you are even a tad sparkly. This should prove interesting. You know all the scary things that people say about Scorpios - yes you do. Well you're about to experience the shoe-on-the-other-foot syndrome. Intense interest in you - who are you, where do you come from, what's your favourite colour, can I buy you a car - will become the order of the day. Fun? Yes. Scary? Just a little. Can you handle it? Piece of cake.

Sagittarius - You've done your research, spent hours in the library, honed your prose and completed a dozen proof readings. In other words you've finished your homework. You can be excused for being just a bit smug. You've done a good job. However, be careful that you don't try to take a tenth grade essay to a post-grad doctoral exam. Sure it's a good book report, but not everybody will be sympathetic when you discover your dog really has eaten it.

Capricorn - Imagine that you are able to read people's minds at will. You can tune in and tune out whenever you feel like it. Wouldn't that be great? Okay now imagine that by mind reading you've accidentally discovered an individual who is potentially your soul mate. Will this knowledge that you have acquired help you in any way to establish and build a relationship with this person? I doubt it. See sometimes it's best not to know.

Aquarius - I just read a book based on an Internet phenomenon called "Post Secrets". This guy gave out postcards all over the place with the instructions to write a secret on it and mail it to him. The secret had to be yours, had to be true and had to be written concisely enough that it fit on a postcard. It's like a confessional with total anonymity, no judging and no legal or religious stuff to cloud the issue. You should try it.

Pisces - You're ticked off. At who or what? You don't know. Well okay you do know but you don't feel that you have the right to be ticked off at that particular person or situation. Guess again. You have every right to feel displeasure the problem stems from your inability to correctly identify the root of your feelings. You're best course of action here would be to hunker down in protective mode rather than donning armour and riding out to battle.