Aries - This week you should try to have a peanut butter sandwich always on hand. You don't have to eat it but it should have a bite out of it and then when friends come to you seeking answers for unexpectedly disturbing questions you can claim to have your mouth full and stall for time.
Taurus - You'll soon be forced to re-examine everything you believe when you discover a pair of socks you didn't know you owned. Seriously though, you can take this "a place for everything and everything in it's place" stuff a little too far. Relax and let the socks fall where they may.
Gemini - You might want to get some help with applying your sunscreen. You can't reach everywhere and sand sticks to your hands and it's just so annoying. In fact it can really push your buttons. Don't be the freak on the beach. Let someone else get their hand dirty.
Cancer - They say there's no 'I' in team and athletes always seem anxious not to be seen trying to take all the credit for a win. Even golfers are always thanking someone else and saying they couldn't do it alone. It's great to play well with others, but there is an 'I' in champion.
Leo - There's a lot of fuss about world markets these days and everybody is wondering about the financial future. Well the only advice I can give you about this is don't invest in Popsicles. Sure, they're pretty colours and they taste good, but they don't last.
Virgo - I used to catch my grandmother talking to herself and she would justify it by saying that she was addressing the smartest person in the room. It was funny when I was nine, it would be offensive now. Watch what you say to yourself this week, someone else may take umbrage.
Libra - I have a vague memory of speaking to you about charades at some point but I can't remember when it was so you probably can't either. My point is that you need to be very careful about how you communicate these days and hand gestures are not likely going to be your best bet.
Scorpio - When I was in university I had a chance to take an elective course in a subject that fascinated me. The professor had an odd physical feature that was as fascinating as it was grotesque and I was so distracted that I got nothing from the class. Don't let this happen to you.
Sagittarius - Life is good right now and when you find yourself feeling so happy that you spontaneously burst into song, not only will there be back up singers handy, but a passing orchestra will stop to accompany you and a nearby film crew will capture the whole thing for posterity.
Capricorn - If you're feeling the least bit unsure about something, it's not a bad idea to get it in writing. Especially if you're not certain that everyone is on board with your decisions. Make sure your waitress has a pen and a pad of paper if you want to have the lunch you ordered.
Aquarius - Impromptu parties are the best kind. You save yourself weeks of worrying about guest lists, menus, decorations and the like. So much better to just suddenly find yourself with a house full of fun. The only drawback of course is that you haven't prearranged a time for the party to end.
Pisces - Do you know why bears hibernate? It's not because of the cold - they're covered in fur. Okay think now, why do we use the term 'grumpy old bear' instead of 'grumpy old hamster'? Bears hibernate because this is their grumpy time of year and you would do well to emulate them.
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Taurus: that was bang on. I have been away for a few days and when i came back my mom had place 3 new pairs of socks in my closet cus she thought i could use some. It corresponds with other things going on as well which i wont make public here. But Bang on!
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