Aries - Science now thinks that the series of people who were the voice of the Oracle at Delphi were probably high on methane fumes leaking from the earth. What in ancient times was revered as the voice of the gods was actually the stoned ramblings of a fallible human being. Oops! So, all this stuff you're telling everybody....is it actually divine inspiration or should you be using your inside voice?

Taurus - You are an all or nothing kind of person and you rarely do anything in half measures. At the moment you appear to be stuck exactly half way to some exquisite horizon that only you can see....and it's driving you nuts! Is it possible that you need glasses, because from here, it looks as though you're aiming at 5 widely divergent targets, not one. By all means continue to strive toward all 5, but could you consider cutting back to 3 at a time?

Gemini - Have you ever been shot out of a cannon? Sure, there are dangers in attempting it but nothing ventured nothing gained and you should consider trying it at least once. There will be those among your acquaintance who will try to talk you out of this. Listen carefully to their reasoning and then present them with your own. Then listen again. You should find that they'll not only be on board with it, they'll supply your safety net.

Cancer - So you're finding yourself bursting into anguished tears, uncontrolled laughter and exuberant flatulence and have absolutely no idea where all of this is coming from. It's only human to be embarrassed by these startling public eruptions and to rush to defend or excuse them, but that may not be your best course of action right now. Just accept that these things happen and in private sit down for a serious tete-a-tete with those emotions of yours.

Leo - Until further notice, the Gypsy will assume that you have been kidnapped by alien beings and are currently undergoing some rigorous - though pleasant - training by a race light years superior to our own. Some of you feel this is the reason you were born. Some of you want out right now. For those of you in the second group help is available. Blink once for yes and twice for no.

Virgo - We're all in agreement that the world would be a much better place if the sky were an unusual shade of lilac filled with green clouds; if rain was fuchsia and snow was orange; if grass were red and trees were blue - or whatever it is that these things look like through your eyes. The sad fact is that they're not. You might want to consider inventing glasses that will let the rest of us share your vision. Until then you will have to paint word pictures.

Libra - There are three rules to successful steering of any type of vehicle - bicycle, car, 747. One - keep a light but firm grasp on the wheel; two - don't slew the wheel from side to side, try to maintain a steady course; and three - never ever let anyone else gain control of the wheel - power struggles equal crashes. However, don't be afraid to follow directions - a good navigator is worth their weight in gold, and a good navigator also won't drive you into a tree.

Scorpio - You should be in understudy mode - the leading role is not yours but you need to be learning all the moves, memorizing the lines and rehearsing your blocking as if it were going to be your name that goes up in lights. You might never get called upon. The lead in this play might not break an ankle, not lose their voice or not get a last minute offer from Hollywood. You might not have to be ready, but you should always look as though you are.

Sagittarius - The best advice for you this week Sagittarius, is don't party with newbies. You are in the zone, ready to go, know what you want and want to have the maximum amount of fun getting it. The last thing in the world you need is to be tripping over a bunch of clueless klutzes. If you do encounter neophytes, the worst that can happen is that you'll have to ask them politely to get out of your way, but still, sheesh, buzz kill!

Capricorn - If someone thinks you're crazy, how do you convince them otherwise without looking even crazier than they already think you are? Experience has taught you to be prepared with a detailed and reasoned defense of everything you do....which, when you come to think about it is a little bit crazy, no? But honestly, who cares if people think you're crazy? Practice saying "not me" over and over, but quietly in case someone hears and thinks you're crazy.

Aquarius - Your mind is like an alcoholic lapidary - it is a sharp and incisive tool but it can sometimes be a little shaky on the details. Focus for a while and you will find yourself with a crick in your neck and no clear memory of what you're trying to achieve. Two things to keep in mind here - one is that you must only concentrate on the things you truly love, and two, get up and stretch your legs from time to time.

Pisces - If you can't be in The Grand Bazaar now, at least make the effort to go shopping. Oh sure, times are tight, money is tighter and you don't really need anything anyway - BUT - if you were to happen to find yourself in the market place you might just discover a real steal on something that you have always dreamed of having, or you might be offered a good price for that white elephant you've been toting around. The name of the game is haggle.